The Knut Song

[Mlle Bienvenu]

This filk is based on Flanders and Swann’s ‘The Gnu’


The Knut Song

A year ago, last Thursday
I was strolling down the lane
when I wandered to a coin collector’s shop
He was laying down the law about exchange rates in Peru and how many different coins Japan has got.
So I asked him:
'What's that coin over there?'
He answered: 'Oh, it's a h’Eagle'
I might of gone on thinking that was that.
If the odd old man nearby hadn’t put that chap to shame
And remarked: 'It h'aint a h'Eagle’
It’s a K-nut.'

'It’s a K-nut
It’s a K-nut
The K-nicest coin the wizarding world has got
It’s a K-nut
It’s a K-nut
You really ought to k-now w-hat’s w-hat
It’s a K-nut
Pronounce kuh and nut
It’s k-not a Sickle or a Galleon but
just let me introduce
It’s k-neither man or moose
Oh k-no k-no k-no It’s a k-nut'

I had taken furnished lodgings at The Leaky Cauldron Inn
Whence I travelled on to Ashton-under-Lyne it was actually
And the second night I stayed there I was woken from a dream
That I'll tell you all about some other time
I strolled down Diagon Alley and I came upon a bank
And looked to see what the goblin’s got
A Sickle? No, it's not a Sickle. A Galleon? Unlikely, Really. The Bronze Olympic Medal?
When I thought I heard a voice:
It’s a k-nut.

'It’s a K-nut
A k-nother k-nut
The K-nicest coin the wizarding world has got
It’s a K-nut
It’s a K-nut
You really ought to k-now w-hat’s w-hat
It’s a K-nut
Said kuh and nut
without a silent ‘k’ like some have thought
Isn’t it just k-nice that you asked someone’s advice
Oh, k-no, k-no, k-no,
K-no k-no k-no It’s a k-nut
K-no k-no k-no It’s a k-nut

[Demonic Neko]

ROTFLMAO OH my GAWD! This is soooo frikin funny!
;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

[Mlle Bienvenu]

A year ago, last Thursday
I was strolling in the zoo
when I met a man who though he knew the lot.
He was laying down the law about the habits of baboons and how many spines a porcupine has got.
So I asked him:
'What's that creature there'
He answered: 'Oh, it's a h'Elk'
I might of gone on thinking that was true
If the animal in question hadn't put that chap to shame
And remarked: 'I h'aint a h'Elk
I'm a Gnu'
'I'm a Gnu
I'm a Gnu
The g-nicest work of g-nature in the zoo
I'm a Gnu
How do you do
You really ought to k-now w-ho's w-ho's
I'm a Gnu
Spelt G-N-U
I'm g-not a Camel or a Kangaroo
So let me introduce
I'm g-neither man or moose
Oh g-no g-no g-no I'm a Gnu'

I had taken furnished lodgings down at Rustington-on-Sea
Whence I travelled on to Ashton-under-Lyne it was actually
And the second night I stayed there I was woken from a dream
That I'll tell you all about some other time
Among the hunting trophies on the wall above my bed
Stuffed and mounted, was a face I thought I knew;
A Bison? No, it's not a Bison. An Okapi? Unlikely, Really. A Hartebeest?
When I though I heard a voice:
I'm a Gnu
I'm a Gnu
A g-nother gnu
I wish I could g-nash my teeth at you
I'm a Gnu
How do you do
You really ought to k-now w-ho's w-ho's
I'm a Gnu
Spelt G-N-U
Call me Bison or Okapi and I'll sue
G-nor am I the least like that dreadful Hartebeest,
Oh, g-no, g-no, g-no,
G-no g-no g-no I'm a Gnu
G-no g-no g-no I'm a Gnu